Be A Star If Not A Sun

People include you and me imitate others. Even if we try hard to remain without doing so, we can't. We do imitate knowingly or unknowingly many things from others. For example, we imitate our neighbors in keeping our status in the neighborhood.

Imitation is a part of our culture. Inseparable. Ir repairable and Innateness in nature. The very life revolves around this weakness of ours.

Kids imitate parents. School children imitate their class mates. Women imitate glamor gals. Men imitate celebrities. Baby boomers imitate other baby boomers.

Poets imitate other poets. Writers imitate other writers. Critics imitate other critics by criticizing all and everything. The very life is imitation.

Only a thrid person can identify whether a person is imitating another person or not. The one who imitating another seldom knows that he or she is unknowingly imitating someone.

Even in communication also we do imitate others. Look at Arts, Painting, Music, Drama, Film and TV or any other communication media. Imitation is resplendent in communication. Obviously it remains hidden under the surface. But in depth there it looms before you like an iceberg. What you have seen above the surface is only its tip.

Why communication always imitate?

Communication is a natural function that is evolving by itself. Anything that is self-generated cannot stand by itself. Hence communication also cannot stand on its own. It needs a support. And the support comes in some "form": writing, music, painting and the like. Can you imagine any communication without a definite form?

Every one imitates some form of communication from others who did it before. Imitation is suicidal in communication, because it will not last long. Such imitations in communications, let it be in any form, would never contribute to our refined culture. Communication is after all the net result of refined culture.

It takes ingenuity to be "original". Not talent. Originality is sometimes termed creativity. Both these terms are reciprocal in effect. Imitation kills originality. Ingenuity fosters creativity, inspiration and motivation.

So the core functions of any communication are to inspire, inform and motivate. If imitation seeps into it, the basic purpose of communication is not met.

It is better to remain bold in communicating with others. Be genuine and honest to yourself. communicating that way makes you a star, if not a Sun.

Where Time Stands Still

I am a husband, father and above all myself. You may too, perhaps. And there are wives, mothers and women.

Let us talk about being a father. Or being a mother. Being a man, let me tell you about being a father.

I became a father when I am blessed with 'my' child. Suddenly I saw myself turning 'selfish' and 'possessive'. My wife too became so. That is how family is.

Time does not stop for me there. Neither it does stop for others. But I remain a father till the innings are over.

When you look back you feel a secret pleasure in being possessive of your child.
You become possessive because you love them. It is man's nature to own everything he or she loves.

When you look forward you might feel disappointed. Because your children grow into adulthood and slowly become less attached or less imposing as they were used to. You wonder what happened to your love towards them. It is again, because you remain a father to them.

So being a father or mother can be both happy and disappointing as well, in terms of your love to your children. There was a point in Time they loved you, attached to you more than what they do as they grow up. That point of time would not return back to sooth your heart.

And mind you, there is another point of Time in every one's life to discard everything they thought precious: love, possessiveness, affection, attachment and all the feeling parents had had when their kids were small and dependent on you. But the children do love you. Don't forget that.

The act of renunciation of your explicit love and possessiveness will take you far ahead in life in beating disappointment. It will help you live a blood-pressure-free life. I have seen many mothers and fathers too lament over the plight of their kids as they grow day by day.

The next-generation kids of ours doing a favor to us. It is in fact a blessing in disguise. They help us live tension-free for the rest of our life, as soon as they become their own. They can manage themselves. They do not need our support physically anymore. To day they are kings and queens in their own world. They eat the food we never might have tasted in our life when we were of their age.

Where do they go? they also go to the same destination as we are. So don't worry about them. Just keep a watch over them. If you were kind enough with them, they still feel your unseen protection behind them.

Being free now, we have more time now to brood about them. We have more time to do things we seldom did in the past. make use of all the time you have. It is good both for you and your kids.

What A Fool I Am?

"Every man is a damn fool for at least five minutes a day."

I do not know who said this. But I believe it is a universal truth.

The moment I hit the lines, I thought about myself. Yes. I discovered that I am a 'damn fool'. Not for five minutes a day, but for the whole life since marriage.

Foolishness is a part of my life. I cannot escape it. I was a fool before the marriage too. But then I did not bother about me. Once married as a fool I have to bother about me. I have to keep abreast of other fools in life. So I became a better fool.

The sea-change has come into me when I met this woman I am talking of.

At first I wanted to find out what kind of a fool she is. Or all women are. Are they better fools than men? Or just worse than men?

I do not have the grit to ask this to her. Because she wont understand my question. She will catch the word 'worse' and the rest is unexplainable.

There is saying "When you are in Rome be a Roman". This saying goes in perfect sync with this:"When you are among fools, be a fool" too. It does not mean that when a man is with a woman, be a woman. It just means that when you are with a woman be a stupid fool. Else the repercussions will be disgraceful.

Who is a better fool? The man or the woman? Man of course is a "damn fool". What a woman would then be? Is there any word to describe the "better" part of the fool in a woman?

Even Shakespeare, who invented more than 1700 words in English, could not invent a suitable word to define a foolish woman. No man can define a woman, leave alone a 'foolish woman'. Neither a woman could define a woman.

Being a damn fool I tried to explore my woman in depth. It took nearly 25 years to conclude my research findings. My findings can be distilled into a small group of words like this:

"A woman is like the vanity bag she uses. Once you open it you find more hidden pockets in it, both inside and outside. All filled with junk."

What a fool I am!

Fall In Love, Now!

Life is simple. But living the life is a tedious process.
Life does not end. Only the precess of living ends.

Between the sun rise and the sun set, many things do happen.
What we experience until we go to bed is not life, but the act of living.

To face life, we do not need anyone. But to continue living, we need the support of someone. Because living the reality is nerve-racking. Hopes get shattered. Smiles turn sour.Ambitions become nightmares. Dreams get disillusioned.

In reality, to live the life we all need to be bold. Boldness is an attitude we generate, and stick on to continue living. Boldness is evolved when we think we have a companion to support us, help us and lead us. No human existence is possible without the support of another human being.

The term 'support' has a wide range of meanings that would fit each individuals need. But remember, support never comes free from another human being. One has to sacrifice something while the other has to accept something in return to establish mutual support.

The very thought of such a mutual support makes living a bit easier, comfortable, soothing and peaceful. What one pays for it is another one's need. We call it "love".

Let me tell you, mere love is only a fever. It comes and goes. Once the fever is over you turn to another one for love. Love is a passing illusion. It never makes life easier. It makes living more devilish than it actually is.

So how do we face life, or the process of living, boldly? The simple formula for living free is to love someone generously. It is "selfless love".

Selfless love has a meaning. Its meaning is understood by the taker, not the giver. The takers support the givers.

Selfless love is eternal. It is not a passing fancy like ordinary love. Selfless love is a rare breed of its own. Even ardent lovers do miss it. Even couples do miss it in their married life. In fact no one seeks it. Selfless love is more godly. It makes life peaceful, simpler and holistic.

So fall in selfless love, I say. Ignore the social taboos or stigmas to experience selfless love. Women need it more badly than men. Only men can give it to a woman. That is the charm of it.
Then it becomes a real-life problem of the society. Not yours.